The Woman, Meg (sisterfish) wrote,
The Woman, Meg
sisterfish

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Pondering Marriage.....

I've had so many people tell me that getting married is going to "make a changes you don't even expect" that I'm starting to wonder....is it really going to change things about our relationship?

I freely admit that I'm a very lucky girl. John is one of the most even-tempered, down-to-earth, geeky boys I've ever met. He's a genuninely nice guy (and probably going to be embarassed that I say so), and I love him lots and lots.

But is getting married going to change the fundamental nature of our relationship? I really don't think so. We've lived together for several years, we're pretty sure of each others' foibles and habits, our finances are open books to each other. Other than becoming Mrs. Safranek, I don't know what else would change.

I know that I'm nesting, but I think that just has to do with having our new house. I like the fact that it's our house, and that we live there, and we never have to worry about the landlord deciding to sell it because property values have gone up. I love that we roam Home Depot saying "this would be cool" and that we have plans in our head for a hot tub on the back patio. I love John's patient look when I announce a new plan for the front yard (and his wisdom in not getting out the shovel until I'm certain.) I think, in a lot of ways, that was a bigger change to our relationship than getting married. We made a huge commitment to ourselves and each other by getting the house. I still sometimes just want to twirl in the living room and chant "mine, mine, mine (which is really ours, ours, ours, but it's really the same thing!). We're learning that we can do repair and remodel projects together without killing each other. We learned that Venetian Red takes way too many coats to cover, but that it's totally worth it.

I know that I'm excited about the wedding, because it's going to be fun, and happy and a party with friends and family. I'm probably more excited about it than I expected to be, but it's all fun. I'm looking forward to coming home afterward and nesting even more---because if my plans pan out, we'll have most of the painting and new floors done by then, and can come home and simply be. (for a month or so, until it's time to redo the front hill!).

So what of it? Did getting married really change you?
Did it change the way in which others viewed you, even if you'd been in a long-term relationship with the same person?
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